It Came from the Toy Chest: Beyblademen!

Let it rip!! The Energy Zoids have arrived... What are they? MOTU's TOP MEN... Literally TOP MEN... Or TOP MAN and TOP ROBOT. Top half is the humanoid half, the bottom half is a top... like a spinning top.

So, we also have the first handicapped character in MOTU... Trap Jaw and Spikor are technically amputees... and Mekaneck, oh Celestia! Mekaneck, I don't even know how to begin with him. OK Rotar is technically not the first handicapped character, but he's the first one who pretty much lost EVERYTHING FROM THE WAIST DOWN...
HE has no bunghole... Also he's a Walter Peck... I hope that Rotar had sex before losing his Johnson, otherwise he'll be a virgin...

Twistoid is just a robot that Skeletor made after getting penis envy over Rotar...

So, let's crack 'em open and see what the deal is with AW HELL NAW!
LEGS! I ended up being wrong, way wrong on them.

I have to be honest... I don't like the Energy Zoids... But they are a requirement to complete the Vintage Roster... So, I'll start with a comic showcasing them in a way reminiscent of the FIRST It Came From the Toy Chest.

 

But, we need Ratings and Explanations and all that, so here they are!

Articulation:
When including the legs. Rotar and Twistoid behave like standard MOTUC Figures. My Twistoid has a bit of an issue with rotating the arms up or down. They tend to get a bit stuck at times.
4.0 for Rotar 3.5 for Twistoid

Paint and Sculpt:
They look like the Vintage Toys Classicized... Rotar is mostly made out of old pieces, but Twistoid got new arms and forearms... Wonder if the Biceps could be reused on Artilla.
Legs are blegh! Especially Twistoid's. Seeing that I'll display them legless, the legs aren't important. Now I want to talk about their armors and heads. I see everyone suggesting turn their heads backwards to have an "alternate look for them". Don't. The Helmet and armor designs remind me of the mimicry ability that some animals have. (Like some moths having wing patterns that look like the eyes of a larger predator, or how the Milk Snake kinda resembles the Coral Snake.) The armor on the back of the E-Zoids looks like the front. Same with the helmet. Since these guys spin around like crazy, the enemy won't be able to discern the front from the back when attacking. Oops! getting sidetracked there.

Paintwise, they're mostly OK-ish, aside Twistoid's big blue slop on his helm.

I'd say about 3.5 for Rotar and 3.5 for Twistoid.

Accessories:
We have stupid legs. Boring stands, less boring stands, and 1 crappy weapon per character.
5.0 for both due to the amount of stuff that they have.

Overall score:
Rotar gets a 4.17 as his overall score and Twistoid gets a 4.0 which gives this pack an overall score of: 4.09, which is good. Here's the thing, while it IS a good score, I AM Underwhelmed by the figures. I feel like the legs were a waste of time and money, the reduced Deco on the weapons and craptacular sculpted chain hurts them. These guys are so not worth the $55 tag that they got. Had they axed the legs, they would have been cheaper and maybe more exciting.

I'm hoping that the 2016 SDCC Item packs some more bite than this...